I'm not very much a relationship person.I never was and my friends back at school would probably agree.I enjoy it when the seatbelts off,I prefer floating in outer space rather than be screwed to the floor.I break hearts and hopes.But I don't do that because I enjoy to..it's because I'm scared.Scared of what I'm not so sure.Maybe I fear I'de lose my cutting edge.That people would see the real me and once they'll do they'll jumo off a building or something.,THINKING I'm the Omen.
My pA teacher once told me that I was like a pigeon.(Haha...xde burung comel lg ke).He said I lure them close bt when they DO come I just take off.I'm just not that good in handling a relationship.Well I decided that, even before trying.Plus I knew having a relationship during school would not last.Unless you're in it for the experience,to look good or u think ur sooOOo so in love than be my guest( wen actually 2 years later ur suddenly not SO in love anymore and all THAT was just a waste of tym )
But as time passes by,and you finally find someone,you stop stare and think.."Why not?".So here I am Miss-I-dont want-any-commitment and all finally in a relationship...and once upon a time,before this happened..I've always promised myself when I do become someones someone,to not to be clingy..to keep in mind that he is NOT the only thing important in this world.Not to talk about him all the time and to still make time for ur family and friends.
But still it has changed me.Some are good but most of them are bad of course.And I'm not blaming him or our relationship.This one's on me.
Ladies become super duper sensitive around their men.I mean like reeeaaly3 sensitive.I think my threshold of being terase is soooo loooww nowadays..more or less u feel more emotional towards your friends as well.And that may cause a problem. A few of my gfs that have broken up recently went throught similar experiences and stages of the relationship.And we're talking about great guys..not those flirty dirty guys..but those 'my eyes are only on u' type of guys.Nice,sweet and kind.
How can a relationship end when the guy is perfect?Usually when the guy's a good catch,then the relationship will stay strong..
This is usually what happens.
U become hypersensitive and he starts to NOT know how to handle u anymore
Every teeny tiny mistake HE does is zoomed in like a gazillion times more
U have bad mood swings and u blow ur steam on him when he has nothing to do with it.
When u have a problem u ignore him but u maintain a normal face in the publc which hurts hi m coz he feels HE did somthing.
When he forgets something that was KINDA important to u,u'll think he doesnt care anymore and become more depressed which takes effect on the relationship
U have tantrums and start to NOT consider his feelings as if they're nothing and mre spotlike on yours
U even start to physically n emotionally abuse him
He'll feel ur not happy,and that u might actually have someone else in ur life and thats the reason ur pushing him away when even u urself have NO idea why ur being such and idiot
He starts to show a bit of aggressiveness as he starts to not take crap anymore
Ur sad and everynight at the end of it,something goes wrong
He'll be bored with repeating cycle which sounds like a broken record.
He's fed-up,she's fed up..they're fed-up
They break it off..he finds someone or maybe just solitude..n ShE just realised her loss.
And they lived ever after?
So when I tell them my story,all of them advised me tp be patient,be kind,be thoughtful,be forgiving,be accepting...or else?
can i?must i?
I want to but how? How before its too late.
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